Reflect

It's hard to believe that for the past 35 of my 60 years, my focus has been on the wonderful world of children's early years, both in educational settings and within families. Aside from a brief stint waitressing in a pizza restaurant (complete with a memorable green nylon bolero!), this has been my lifelong vocation. For this week's Wednesday Wisdom, I want to highlight my deep belief in the need for freedom and creative opportunities for early years children, their teachers and parents. I'll also share a brief glimpse into the vibrant environment of my early years classrooms and invite you to reflect on your own perspectives on what really matters for the 0-5 year olds in your lives.

Back in 1990, I was set free to influence the minds and hearts of little people. I had always dreamt of being a teacher. I role-played being a teacher as a child, and suddenly, I found myself in charge of my own classroom, packed with 42 little people (yes, really! Thank goodness class sizes have reduced since then). From that point on, my life focused on planning and creating the best days I could for these young children, who were happy to learn whatever I offered them. Nowadays, early years classrooms are much more child-led, and we are rightly guided by what interests them.

Motivate

One of my favourite classroom memories is of a three-year-old who looked into my eyes and said, with complete certainty, “You’re interested in me, aren’t you.” It wasn’t a question. It was a recognition of connection. When children feel safe, seen and supported, they are far more likely to thrive. Secure attachments with trusted adults help children develop confidence, trust and the emotional resilience they’ll draw on throughout life. At Tooled Up, we’re often asked about developing emotional regulation in young children, and the answer often begins with connection. Children begin to learn to manage feelings through the calm, consistent presence of adults who model emotional regulation (what we call co-regulation). As caregivers, we must strive to model and teach emotional regulation strategies to the children we care about so deeply. I distinctly remember introducing yoga to a nursery group about ten years ago. Breathing deeply together to soothing music helped even my most active children settle. A simple, shared practice; a moment of calm connection.

As a teacher, relationships beyond the child matter too. I once sat with an anxious mum in a train station shelter one evening, reassuring her about early education as we both returned from London. It gave her the confidence to enrol her son, and later, his younger brother, in our setting. Trust takes time and effort, but it can be transformative.

I also want to mention the powerful role of grandparents. These intergenerational relationships are often rich in love, stability and storytelling. When we hosted Grandparents’ Days, the ripple effects were profound. Seeing their grandchildren’s experiences first hand gave grandparents a new appreciation for our work, which they fed back to their children, strengthening the trust between home and setting. Collaborative partnerships, across generations and roles, are key in the early years.

Back in the classroom, whether my pupils were linking every corner of the classroom with sellotape and masking tape, painting the undersides of tables while lying on their backs, putting temporary tattoos on one another after lunch, or mixing up potions with paint, flour, glue, popcorn and rice, one thing was clear: the freedom to create without needing to justify the outcome is a joyful and liberating experience. Creativity lights up the brain. It involves forming new connections between different brain regions, especially the default mode network (DMN), the part activated when children daydream, recall memories, self-reflect or mind-wander. Creativity has always been my favourite part of working with children. It builds confidence, sparks richer vocabulary and encourages risk-taking. And sometimes, it all starts with a colourful, messy, textured potion made from whatever we can find in the cupboard.

And what about energy? Well, young children are meant to move. They run, climb, roll, balance, and leap, not just for fun, but because it’s how they grow. This is the stage of life where motor skills are refined, curiosity is constant and energy is abundant. Their brains are processing new information at a staggering rate, and movement helps them regulate attention, emotions and focus. I’ve often been asked by parents, “How do you keep up with them?” The truth is, we’re not meant to. We’re meant to notice, appreciate and support. Young children are impulsive and spontaneous because they’re learning to self-regulate. Their energy isn’t a problem to solve. It’s an invitation to connect.

Support

Well, let’s try to prioritise connection. Get down to their level. Let them know you’re truly present. Consistent, attuned relationships are foundational for everything else. Did you know that parental sensitivity at three years old predicts children’s social and emotional competence into adulthood?

Let’s champion creativity. Offer materials without expectations. Let children create for the sake of it. Celebrate the mess, the noise, the spontaneity. That’s where growth happens. Playfulness, open-mindedness, thinking ‘outside the box’. These are things that most children naturally engage in. It thrives in judgement-free, playful environments where children are given space to come up with ideas themselves. Did you know that creativity is also intricately linked with the development of emotional skills and that by developing creative skills, we also develop emotional skills? In fact, studies have shown that observing, discussing and creating art provide a powerful medium for developing emotional skills and building emotional vocabulary.

Let’s encourage movement. Build in time for running, rolling, climbing and jumping. These aren’t just “extras”, they’re fundamental to development and emotional regulation. This is vital as we know that many young children at primary school are still only able to perform fundamental movement skills (the building blocks of more complex movement), such as running, skipping, catching, throwing, kicking or balancing to a low level. In fact, one English study found that less than one fifth of children aged six to nine years old have mastered the four key movement skills identified in the PE curriculum, yet early acquisition of these skills boosts long-term physical fitness and activity levels. Let’s prioritise this where we can.

Where possible, let’s foster intergenerational links. If we can, involve grandparents and other family members in children’s learning journeys. Their love and stories enrich young lives. Professor Anna Tarrant told us that whilst the support, care and nurture provided by grandparents is often hidden from view, research shows that active grandparents have significant positive impacts on family life. In fact, grandparental involvement can improve overall wellbeing for everyone concerned, positively influencing children’s behaviour, supporting educational development and providing a link to the past.

Let’s pause for play. Let the rhythms of childhood remind you of your own. Inject family life with magical thinking, puppetry, laughter, imagination, role play and a dose of sensory treats. As Paul Ramchandani, LEGO Professor of Play in Education, Development and Learning at Cambridge University, told us earlier this year; “If we really listen to what children tell us about what they value and find important, they will always mention play”. It’s a huge and vital part of their lives and is immeasurably valuable, contributing to both learning and emotional and social competence. We can vary how we play. At times, we might let our children take the lead, whilst we follow. At others, we might simply sit back and let them get on with it. Sometimes, there is real value in joining in, but at their pace, supporting their developing autonomy. Sometimes, we can take the lead. We want children to experience a wide range of play and have a varied play diet!

Remember, we are never too old to wonder, explore and be present. Let’s lean into young children’s thirst for knowledge and their curiosity about the world. Fascinating research by Dr Marina Bazhydai found that from as young as 12 months old, babies are capable of distinguishing knowledgeable people in their environment from those who are less knowledgeable, and will look to them for more information when presented with a question that they do not know the answer to. Incredible! Let’s promote wonder, embracing children’s own interests. Early years teachers might even consider finding out to what extent wonder-promoting features are present in their classrooms by using the brilliantly named ‘Wonder Chart’, developed by Dr Bazhydai and others at Lancaster University.

At Tooled Up, we’re fortunate to work with numerous experts in early childhood, and we’re continually developing resources that support caregivers and educators in nurturing young children’s wellbeing. From practical strategies on co-regulation, sensory play, mattering and language development, to empowering guidance on managing transitions, big feelings and promoting emotional literacy, our content and tips are grounded in research, yet easy to use in real life. If you are a Tooled Up member, take a look at the box below for just a few helpful links. There’s much more to be found on the platform!

I love reading this A.A. Milne poem and will leave you with it. It’s a little reminder to find time for wandering and wondering, talking and connection, to maintain curiosity and learn from the fabulous young children around us.

“I'm three years old and I'm full of wonder,

I'm three years old and I talk so much.

I'm three years old and I'm made to wander,

I'm three years old and I love to clutch.”