Hi Tooled Up, my daughter's junior school is mixing classes next year and I feel worried for my daughter. What would you advise? She is particularly concerned about not being with her bestfriend next year as they have always been in the same class.

Dear Parent,

Firstly, it is entirely normal to worry about the changes that lie ahead for our children and to wonder how they will cope. You are not alone. The start of a new academic year brings many changes to school life: new classrooms, teachers, classmates, routines, timetables and perhaps even different lunch menus. It sounds as though you may be carrying some understandable anxiety about the changes to come, even if these have already been explained by the school.

For a moment, imagine that nothing changed throughout your child's entire time in junior school. Imagine the same classroom, the same teacher, the same friendship group and the same routines year after year.

Now imagine the alternative: a new teacher who looks and sounds different, unfamiliar classmates, fresh surroundings and opportunities to form new friendships and experiences.

The first scenario undoubtedly offers comfort and predictability. But where is the opportunity to develop flexibility, resilience and confidence in unfamiliar situations? Childhood, and particularly the junior school years, are in many ways preparation for a much larger world. Learning to adapt, cope with uncertainty and connect with new people are important life skills that children will need long after they leave junior school.

Some anxiety about change is entirely normal. However, it can help to reframe those wobbles as opportunities for growth. Ask yourself: what strengths might my child develop by navigating this transition? Perhaps they will learn to make new friends, become more adaptable, or discover that they can cope with situations that once felt daunting.

Children often take their emotional cues from the adults around them. By approaching change with confidence and curiosity, we model the courage and flexibility we hope they will develop themselves. This does not mean ignoring children's concerns. Rather, it means listening carefully whilst also communicating our belief in their ability to cope.

It is also worth reflecting on whether we may have unintentionally passed on some of our own worries. If children overhear adults expressing anxiety about the mixing of classes or an incoming teacher, it can create worries that were not there in the first place.

Take a moment to consider what is really concerning you. Hand on heart, what is the worst realistic outcome? If that happened, how would you help your child cope? On the other side of that challenge may be a child who has developed new coping skills, greater confidence and a stronger understanding of their own capabilities.

If your child has raised concerns, begin by validating their feelings:

"I can see that this is making you feel a little worried. Let's talk about that."

"Tell me a bit more about why that feels difficult."

Jumping straight to reassurance does not always reduce anxiety. Instead, try to remain curious and allow your child to lead the conversation.

If, for example, your child expresses concern about having unfamiliar classmates or playing with children they do not know well, gently explore their reasoning. Have they heard someone else express a similar concern? Are they worried they will not know what to say or play? Avoid making assumptions. Ask questions and listen carefully.

Whatever your child shares, gently encourage them to think about the potential benefits of meeting new people and trying something different. Together, think of a time when they unexpectedly made a friend on holiday, at a club or elsewhere. What helped that friendship happen? Could there be something exciting about entering a new situation without knowing exactly how it will turn out?

It can also be helpful to share your own experiences of change. Talk about times when you felt uncertain and what helped you cope. Family stories about changes that initially felt uncomfortable but ultimately led to positive outcomes can be particularly powerful.

If your child is managing changes at school alongside other changes in their life, there are several tried and tested strategies that may help. They might draw their worries, write them down and place them in a family "wobble jar", or imagine the first few days of school and think together about what they can and cannot control.

Sometimes it can be useful to transform a worry into a wonder. For example:

"I'm worried I won't see Jessica during the day" can become "I wonder whether I'll still see Jessica at playtime or after school."

As the new school year approaches, role play can also be effective. Practise ways to start conversations with unfamiliar peers, think of games they could invite others to join, and remind your child that existing friendships can continue both inside and outside school.

If your concern is your child's wellbeing, remember that wellbeing is strengthened by connection, belonging and play; qualities that school communities are uniquely placed to provide.

If school life is changing, consider turning up the dial on predictability at home. Maintain familiar routines, bedtime rituals and consistent parenting. When children feel securely anchored by the things that remain the same, they are often far more capable of managing the things that are different.

With that secure base in place, you can feel confident that your child is being given the very best opportunity to thrive when September arrives.

Watch this webinar for further supportive tips on helping children navigate friendships and change during the junior school years and this webinar on how to raise a resilient child.